Friday, July 27, 2012

Hai guys, please listen to my awesome "mash-ups"!

[Editor's note: this post was recently found among a cache of lost I Wish You Would posts that appear to have been written in 2005. As a result, the content may seem very slightly dated. Moreover, discerning readers may also note that the writing style differs very slightly from the one regular I Wish You Would readers (both of you) have grown accustomed to.]

Hey, have you heard about this new craze called "mash-ups"? It's the hottest thing in the DJ world! All the really happening new DJs do this thing where they like take part of one awesome song and put it with part of another awesome song to make an even more awesome song! (They like "mash" the two songs together, get it?) And then, best of all, the DJ makes a clever name for the "mash-up" that has parts of the names of the original song!

For example, a DJ could take like the instrumental from Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit" and put the vocals from Destiny's Child's "Bootylicious" on top of it and call it "Smells Like Teen Booty"! Don't believe me? Well tough, because somebody already did that! Why if the technology only existed, I would totally prove it to you with like an interwebz link so you could experience it yourself! [Editor's note: this post was apparently written before youtube. Here is such a link.]

If you are unfamiliar with "mash-ups", trust me it is totally the thing now. Crowds love it! Promoters pay you lots of money to play nothing but these "mash-ups" in things called "ultra lounges"! (An "ultra lounge" is like a way better nightclub with bottle service and a lot of white couches.) It's like, why would anybody want to party to music that is unmashed?! That would be like going to a restaurant and ordering beer and pizza and soup and chocolate cake and then they brought them to you in four separate dishes instead of letting you enjoy them at the same time!

Anyhoo, since I'm never one to let a bandwagon pass unmolested, I decided to get in on the action by making my own "mash-ups"! Of course you know me, I had to be different, so I decided to make some "mash-ups" from some older songs! I chose two super-famous classic funk songs, James Brown's "Cold Sweat" and the Third Guitar's "Baby Don't You Cry". [Editor's note: this and this are links to videos of the original songs.]

I worked really hard to choose a concept for the "mash-ups" that made sense and get the "mash-ups" in the proper key. (JK, bros! Nobody cares about that stuff, LOL!) I thought it would be really cool if I took the acapellas of these really old songs and made them sound even older by adding some slow sad old man music! Cool idea, right?! But wait until you hear the "mash-ups"! I even made artwork to make them look like actual old records so I could fool people who don't know how about "mash-ups" into thinking these are old original records! Pretty clever, right?! Shhh, don't tell anybody, bro!

James Brown: "I Don't Care" (King, 1964)

The Soul Pleasers: "Baby Don't Cry" (Living Legend, 196?)

If you like these "mash-ups" please show me love on my Myspace! K thanx, bai!

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